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rob white

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Slackjaw

My Children Are Not The Content Mine I Imagined Them To Be

My ugly baby just sits there, doing nothing, being nothing, and most importantly: earning nothing.

Jan 4, 2024

My Children Are Not The Content Mine I Imagined Them To Be

Jan 4, 2024

Published in
Slackjaw

Uncle Siskel’s Cowboy Chili Recipe

Sometimes, my son Carrot gives a tug on my pant leg and asks why we can’t eat it every day.

Jan 28

Uncle Siskel’s Cowboy Chili Recipe

Jan 28

Published in
Slackjaw

Uh Oh, Scientists Have Discovered That Milk Is Cum

The confusion of the news stopped people in their tracks at first, but we didn’t question it. Milk was cum now, and we acted accordingly.

Jan 7

Uh Oh, Scientists Have Discovered That Milk Is Cum

Jan 7

Published in
Rock n’ Heavy

Reflections on NOFX

My thoughts on the end of the storied career of a punk legends.

Oct 16, 2024

Reflections on NOFX

Oct 16, 2024

Published in
Slackjaw

Man Card Revoked!

“What good are you?” I yelled at my useless penis as I urinated.

Jun 30, 2024

Man Card Revoked!

Jun 30, 2024

Published in
Slackjaw

I Thought I Was Using AI To Write My Novel, But It’s Just A Guy Named “Al”

I typed a defiant “?” followed by a more prodding “????????”

Apr 14, 2024

I Thought I Was Using AI To Write My Novel, But It’s Just A Guy Named “Al”

Apr 14, 2024

Armin Meiwes, My Parents and Dinner.

You burnt the penis? That is just a waste of penis.

Jan 17, 2024

Armin Meiwes, My Parents and Dinner.

Jan 17, 2024

I’m a Secondary Character on Murder, She Wrote, and I Have to Solve This Crime.

She didn’t come alone, of course. The town’s overbearing mayor and useless sheriff were already on the scene, bumbling about, complaining…

Dec 31, 2023

I’m a Secondary Character on Murder, She Wrote, and I Have to Solve This Crime.

Dec 31, 2023

Fourteen years ago, I put ketchup on a hotdog, and now I’m on death row in a supermax prison.

Rudimentary phones with rudimentary cameras snapped pictures of a rudimentary man trying to enjoy a hot dog any damn way he pleased.

Nov 20, 2023

Fourteen years ago, I put ketchup on a hotdog, and now I’m on death row in a supermax prison.

Nov 20, 2023

Meditating on the Wind With Thomas UglyWeiner

Don’t fuck with that UglyWeiner

Sep 19, 2023

Meditating on the Wind With Thomas UglyWeiner

Sep 19, 2023

rob white

rob white

Rob White is a Canadian-based award-winning filmmaker and part-time author. Follow him on Instagram @robwhitemakemakesstuff

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